2017 · College · goals · gypsy · Uncategorized

Procrastination…

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I won’t let myself get behind on college work is probably the biggest lie I tell myself these days. I started out the year strong, I was 6 weeks ahead of the course schedule, I was keeping on top of it. This lasted until the first assignment that I found ridiculously difficult and I hated everything about college. It wasn’t even that hard of an assignment honestly looking back but at the time I just could not for the life of me get my head around it. In my usual fashion I saw failure on the horizon and decided that I wasn’t going to try. I wallowed for about 2 days then sucked it up and got it done and I got a higher mark than I was expecting. But then came Christmas and I didn’t even think about college. There was too much going on and I decided that going out and spending time with my friends and family was more important because well I’m a procrastinator and what else would I do.

I am the queen of procrastination. Assignment due in 2 weeks? That’s loads of time, I’ll just watch Sherlock from the start again and then I’ll get on it. Oh what’s that I hear? The sound of anything bloody else I could be doing! It calls and I follow and then find myself stressed out and promising myself it’ll never get that bad again. This is also a lie. So this year I am really going to try get on top of it.

Anybody who knows me knows I love social media. With my social anxiety when I am alone in a crowded place or waiting on somebody or just generally feel vulnerable I am attached to my phone. Bad habit I know but it is what it is. Instagram and YouTube are my absolute favourites and I can spend way to long on these. These are my tools of procrastination. So I decided today to delete the apps from my phone. Facebook, Messenger, Instagram, Youtube and Snapchat. All gone bye bye because even when I am studying my phone buzzes and I automatically check it. So that’s step 1.

Step 2 is working ahead. I have 2 assignments due and then a break week for each module so I am going to take that time to get ahead in the modules so if something does come up then I am equipped to take a day off. Right now if I take a day off I’m going to fail so I need to get on it.

Sleep is Step 3. Naps are also a downfall because I LOVE a good nap. Between that and the fact that I have been having a social life that has been cutting into my normal sleep schedule I need to get more sleep. I do however have a rubber arm and find it hard to say no to a good night out, I would say that’s a point I need to work on however I’m having fun so just no lol.

Anyway I’m off to go do some assignments. Wish me luck, God knows I need it!

Until next time, let your gypsy soul wander.

2017 · Anxiety · goals · gypsy · Just Me · Lifestyle · resolutions · Uncategorized

2017 New Year, Same Me.

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Back to the blog. I am filled with fantastic intentions that this will be a regular occurrence but lets be honest my track history tells a very different story so we shall see what happens.

So its officially 2017 and I for one am glad to see the back of 2016. 2016 was a hard year that taught me a lot about myself but I wouldn’t ever want to relive it. So this time of year you start to see the usual “New Year, New Me” posts that circulate on Facebook, Instagram, Snap Chat etc. People join gyms, give up smoking, start clean eating, apply to go back to school. They start the year with grandiose plans with step by step plans and lists and noticeboards and journals. They have great intentions and start off with gusto. In fairness there are some people who will keep this up for the year, I personally have never met them but I am told that they exist. I set goals rather than new years resolutions because constant improvement works so much better for me in my life.

I managed to achieve most of my goals from lat year and this year I have set some more. This year I have a few like go somewhere spectacular on holiday, read 20 books and finish college with a 2:1 which means I need above 80 on nearly every assignment and exam this year and get back driving (preferably without having a panic attack every time there’s traffic). I do need to drink more water and I have to remember to take my supplements because all the scary warnings they gave me after my surgery to take them apparently didn’t have an effect and I have been not taking them more than taking them which is only going to lead to trouble in the long run.

But this year I am mostly working on me. Last year taught me a lot about who I am as well as those around me. I for the first time in my life seem to have a grasp on who I am as well as what I want which if you know me is a bloody miracle in itself. I am moody  and sensitive (too much so at times), I like to take care of people and I’m probably a bit too naive if I’m honest. But all these things make me well me and this year I am accepting that. I want to put myself out there more, I want to take opportunities that I usually let pass me by because I am scared, I want to go on dates and feel confident in myself, I want to be OK with being me which believe me is harder than it looks.

That’s why this year you won’t hear me saying New Year, New Me – I am saying New Year, Same Me and hopefully over the course of the year I will be OK with being the same old me.

Anybody make any resolutions?

Until next time, let your gypsy soul wander.